37 Weeks

Baby is growing!  He is now 7.5 pounds and around 18 inches long, though I think he is longer.  He is kicking a lot and still moving around quite a bit.  I am still very happy with him right where he is.  I know he will come when he is ready or on Feb 11th, which ever comes first!  I have a few sleepless nights, then will have a good night, it just depends.  He is putting pressure on my cervix and that is sometimes pretty painful.  The Braxton Hicks are very frequent and two nights ago I had some that were even waking me up.  But I feel pretty confident that this little guy is going to hang out until we are ready for the c-section.  It has been so fun carrying him that I am fine with this, too!  The kids and Patric are so very excited to hold him finally so soon I will have to share.  I talk to him all the time and rub my belly and I know he is getting used to this.  I tell him to tell his brother how much I love him and I know Chase is taking care of him right now pretty well.  I have felt Chase's presence more and more the last week and it is comforting...this feeling.  Though I miss him terribly and know that as soon as I hold this little one in my arms, I will miss Chase that much more once again--knowing exactly what we have missed out on with Chase.  But the upcoming event is to be a joyous one; one to celebrate and to behold.  And that we will.  

My friends and I had a cooking class the other night and they closed it out with a few baby gifts and cake in celebration of baby Pearson #5.  It was a very fun evening and I was so glad the girls went with me.   It was a very special group of friends and they way they celebrated was tasteful, understanding and not "too much".  I was afraid I was going to be emotional and sad as all these women had already bought us gifts when I was pregnant with Chase and I did not want them to buy more things.....I hadn't gotten rid of any of their stuff the gave me last time and am planning on using it for this baby.  But the evening was so vibrant and busy and fun that I didn't even have a chance to get sad and let my thoughts wander.  They all know that no matter how joyous the occasion, there is sadness in every thing we do now because Chase is not here to be a part of it.  They understand this yet wanted to celebrate for us and with us the utter happiness we are feeling for this new one.  And I am so glad we did.  I am thankful for these women in my life.  And I am deeply humbled by their generosity in gifts, love and companionship during such an emotional time in our lives.  I am so lucky to have this....when at times I never thought I would.  

Our last appointment is next week.  Then we have a busy weekend and plan on heading to Albuquerque a few days before the c-section.  Thank you, little one, for this journey.  I am so lucky to be your mommy and I can't wait to meet you....we will see you soon!

Growing...

I am sitting here at the computer getting kicked and nudged and poked all over (from the inside that is!) and just thought I would journal some of these pregnancy symptoms since we are nearing the end.  I was thinking I was maybe ahead of schedule but after I went back and read my journal and my blog during the last few weeks of Chase's pregnancy, I don't think I am any further along in this pregnancy than I am slated for.  At 35 weeks last time I was feeling very crowded inside, pressure down low and just big.  Very similar to now, I guess.  Man it is so strange feeling that head press down on my cervix (and uncomfortable....as I type this!).  I don't think I felt those things until the last few weeks with the girls....from what I remember anyway.  I see knees and elbows move across my belly this time and I have a very slight line going up my abdomen, though I'm not sure that the line from Chase ever completely faded. My complexion is very good, my hair is great, my nails are so-so, I am starting to swell towards the end of the day (hands and feet).  I am still doing yoga twice a week and biking 3-4 times a week when I am feeling good.   Have been getting up several times a night to pee for a while now.  But seems like I get up around 5 and am wide awake.  May be because I'm fighting with the kitten and may be because I'm getting ready for a newborn, who knows!  Either way, my body is getting used to interrupted and less sleep, as it should.  

We are starting to think about our plans in February with the baby.  But we have so much going on with our life in general that I think the baby is going to end up just coming whether we are ready or not.  And I'm even saying that with a scheduled c-section in mind!  Emma asked me tonight if we were going to a swim meet that weekend before the baby was due and I told her probably since I thought it was in Albuquerque.  She asked if we would all stay up there until the baby was  born then and I told her I was pretty sure they would go back home for a few more days of school until the c-section.  Maybe daddy would take them back and then come back to Albuquerque the day before.  She told me that if they had to go back to Ruidoso to go to school, that she wanted Daddy to stay with me in Albuquerque.  When I asked her why she said because she wanted him there making sure the doctors were doing everything they were supposed to be doing.  I know she's scared still.  Patric & I've talked about this a little bit and about making sure the kids are safe and comforted while I am in surgery and when they see me recovering afterwards....since the last memory they have of me in that condition was terrifying for them.  So this will be a very high priority for us--having the kids where we need them when we need it.  I don't know how we will do all this, but somehow we will. 

34 weeks 5 days

The first thing I have to say is I have been feeling you qutie low lately.  The uncomfortable feeling that stops me in my tracks!  Just reminding me the end of this pregnancy is near (sniff)....just usually not yet I thought!  I have been terribly congested this week...something I've had toward the end of the pregnancy before as well.  And I  also have slimy teeth after I brush them.  Another little  weird recurrence of pregnancy.

We had a perfect 10/10 again on our BPP.  Only this was after we had "acoustic stimulation."  What a fancy term for "we're going to scare the shit out of your baby so he'll wake up and give us some accelerations in his heart rate."   They tooted that buzzer on my lower belly and the baby about jumped right out my belly button.  Then he gave them all the accelerations they wanted in less than 5 minutes.  Sorry about that little buddy.   But it was about the clearest evidence to me that you actually do hear what is going on outside in our world and are stimulated by the sounds we make.  That was cool--just seemed a rotten way to find that out!  Anyway, she got what she needed from your movements after that.  My friend gave me the wonderful idea of recording your heartbeat on my cell phone.....so I did just that. Only a few times!

I absolutely love talking to my doctor about the pregnancy and anything related.  She is so awesome and a great listener.  I felt like I was talking about a thousand words a minute today because I had waited so long to see her and was really needed to get back on the road so I was trying to speed up the conversation and the appointment!  Surgery is scheduled for Feb 11th but I told her I'm feeling advanced things already...like the pressure on my cervix--yowsa!  But I feel like since this is the only pregnancy that I am (as of now anyway) perfectly fine going as long as they want me to.....it'll probably make me go into labor early.  Either way, I'll be ready.  I know we can do this.  And we will!